Amigos, irmãos, realidades

Qui, 09 de Dezembro de 2010 10:32 Escrito por Valter Junior

Vejo que quase sempre espero dos amigos mais do que seria razoável. Na verdade percebo claramente isso exatamente quando fico frustrado com eles. Quando espero deles e não recebo é porque estou esperando mais do que seria razoável.

Tendo a depositar sobre os ombros dos amigos frustrações que tive ou tenho com pessoas de um outro nível de relacionamento. Cobro dos amigos o que não tive do meu pai, avó, tios e irmãos. Por ter claro na mente que existem amigos mais chegados que irmãos, passo a exigir deles uma lealdade própria de um relacionamento de irmãos co-sanguíneos.

Na realidade os relacionamentos co-sanguíneos apontam para o que se deseja pensar sobre eles em nível de coração e alma, mas que pode não vir a acontecer ou se concretizar.

No fim, quando me frustro com meus relacionamentos vejo que a solução está em mim e não nos que dão causa ás minhas frustrações.

Se o amigo não vem, procuro preencher o vazio que a ausência dele deixa e quando ele vier, não precisarei fazer isso.

Quando o amigo não diz, procuro preencher o vazio que o silêncio dele deixou, mas quando ele disser, não precisarei fazer isso.

Talvez seja uma questão de expectativas bem dimensionadas o minimizar e evitar frustrações o quanto possível. Espero, se não recebo, me viro para resolver isso. Espero e recebo pra saber que isso acontece e pode acontecer novamente.

De fato melhor é dar que receber, seja para o próximo, seja pra mim. Ser autor soa bem quando a obra é boa, mas quando sou o autor de uma expectativa mal dimensionada que resulta em frustração, opto por não nomear o autor de tal obra. Preciso me reconhecer autor do que me causa frustrações para também me tornar o autor de atitudes que diminuem a possibilidade de tais frustrações, bem como possibilitam preencher os vazios que me fazem sentir frustrado. Atuo assim na prevenção e correção do problema.

Pronto estou então para perdoar e me perdoar. Celebro os encontros e sou criativo nas ausências. Já que Deus nunca se ausenta, pelo menos nós dois sempre comparecemos aos encontros.

Sou grato a Deus por meus amigos e pela forma que encontrei para mais celebrar a existência de cada um do que lamentar a ausência deles. Tenho mais irmãos em Cristo que amigos, mas sei que os irmãos em Cristo tem imenso potencial para serem amigos e isso acontece com freqüência. Desse modo, os irmãos em Cristo podem se tornar meus amigos amanhã. Mas tenho amigos hoje que não são irmãos em Cristo, pelos quais oro para que se tornem um dia, de modo que a amizade seja eterna.

Aqui e ali me verei lamentando, mas que o lamento me sirva para que eu veja como está meu coração e caminhe na direção do que pode ajudá-lo. Nos Salmos achamos lamentos e celebrações, cada qual tem seu lugar nessa existência. Deus nos ajude a lidar com ambos e amadurecer.
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